From Samana to Siddhartha

            Siddhartha, a Brahmin who believes the only way to find Enlightenment is to find it for oneself through their own experiences, not through learning from doctrines, even from the Buddha himself. Siddhartha is the story of he himself, and his journey of finding the Self and the true meaning of life. In the beginning, he feels he has learned everything he can from teachers of Atman, meditation, etc, and wants to see what else there is to learn in the world by becoming one like a teacher; a Samana. Once he dedicates his decision towards doing so, he confronts his father to leave and become a Samana, and from his way of protest, his father lets him go to live the life he wants. Before embarking on his journey to become a Samana, he questions his teachers in how they've not experienced what they teach, so how could he keep learning of these experiences from Brahmin who have not been enlightened themselves? "...not a single one had succeeded in reaching it, this heavenly world; not one had fully quenched that eternal thirst" (Hesse 7). It is interesting how Siddhartha looks at what he would keep learning and what he can learn if he goes to enlighten himself. Leaving his family to strive for something more is the moment of his Internal Calling, to become the hero and live as he feels is right. When he lives among the forest of the Samanas, he wears little clothing, fasts greatly, and meditates for hours to become one with the world and life around him. As this is a tormenting, yet amazing, experience to him at first, it became tedious and not worthwhile. "Even if Siddhartha fled the Self a thousand times, lingering in nothingness, in the animal, in stone, his return was unavoidable, the hour inescapable when he found himself once more, in sunlight or moonlight, in shade or rain, and once more he was Self, was Siddhartha, and once more he felt the torments of the cycle imposed on him" (Hesse 14). The first time he loses himself with the Self, he becomes one of many animals, such as a heron, and goes through their whole life cycle, in the end waking out of his meditation and finding his Self again, in the agony of his physical state. This is worth it to him until it becomes too familiar, too predictable and a waste of his life. He learns of the cycle of life in segmented hours, but he gains nothing back of the true meaning of life and of the Self; no knowledge, awareness, enlightenment, nothing. His soul mate friend, Govinda, and him travel to the Sublime One, the Buddha, in search of meaning from his holy doctrine. When they hear Buddha's words, Govinda becomes a disciple to him, while Siddhartha has a few things to say to Buddha instead. He is honored to listen to the doctrine, but he realizes that Buddha is only like everyone else, specifically his past teachers. They teach through doctrine for one to possibly find their own enlightenment, but Siddhartha realizes that one must experience it for themselves to truly reach Nirvana like the Sublime One. Buddha found meaning, Self, Atman, and everything for himself, but what he experienced is strictly for his enlightenment, how could his teachings of his experiences help anyone else? Only some tips and guidance are beneficial from his doctrine, but Siddhartha realizes one cannot base their life off someone's experiences, but experience life for themselves to reach their Nirvana. From this, Siddhartha leaves to find the meaning of life and Self for himself, while Govinda stays behind to follow the Buddha.

How Siddhartha sees life as Samana

            Siddhartha sees everything in the world differently now, trying to understand it all in a new perspective. Every object and living thing has meaning to him, and beauty. What he desired previously was doctrine, teaching, and a set way to find Atman and all for himself. Now he is finding meaning for himself by his rules, and it is beautiful to him. "I'll be my own teacher, my own pupil. I'll study myself, learn the secret that is Siddhartha" (Hesse 35). He is embracing life in a different way, a healthier way physically, mentally, and spiritually for him. After staying at a ferryman's house, he travels through the forests to find a new life style, and meeting a woman at the river, he starts to engage through lust with her. Before anything happens, his inner voice tells him to not do something for the pleasure, and to move on; he does. He overcomes lust, wanting to still reach Nirvana and experience life without pleasures such as sex. Then he meets a wealthy, beautiful woman named Kamala, who he talk with for information on how to be successful and live within the city she lives in. She tells him to get new clothes, money, and a job in which he can use his skills. "'I can think. I can wait. I can fast'" (Hesse 50). From his Samana life, all he'd learned to do is think, wait, and fast, and this is all he tells her. This shows how little he possesses in personal skills, and his new love for just experiencing life around him and nothing more. He 'learns' so much from Kamala of the ways of her lifestyle, and thinks she is a teacher to him. He is unaware that he is being hooked to being taught, the thing he wants to stay away from in his new life. Kamala gives him kissing lessons, yet mocks him, leading him on and pushing him away over and over again, but Siddhartha sticks with her for is in love with her. He soon reveals that he can read and write, and this is how he gets to interview with the tradesman Kamaswami. He sometimes is a good business partner, and sometimes not. When he makes mistakes, he doesn't care, nor does he care when he makes profit for Kamaswami. All he cares about is living a good and rather easy life, and experiencing joy, connection and people during his trades, along with nature. If he devastates the business, all he cares about is the experience he has, and how it can benefit him for getting closer to finding meaning, Self, and Nirvana. Thus far in chapters 1-6 in Siddhartha, Siddhartha is finding his own path in his own way, experiencing everything he can and embracing the life he has and has yet to discover.

Siddhartha's new perspective experiencing life!